אני מצטער מאוד

So, it has been almost a month since I have made a post. Quite a bit has happened in said month, so I will give you the Reader's Digest version. I am very sorry about the immense posting break that happened. 

1. Day trips to Tel Aviv, Galilee, and Haifa. (There are no huge stories behind this. We honestly just don't like going to the same beach all the time.)

2. My mother and sister came to Israel. 

     This was a very busy and fun week. It helped me remember that there are cool things here. A lot of the big things (Dome of the Rock, Western Wall, Church of the Holy Sepulchre, etc.) had become so commonplace to me that I forget about the awesomeness of where I am. Not only did I get to see my mother and sister again, but I also was able to see Jerusalem with fresh eyes.

3. I went home for graduation.

     I flew home for graduation about one week ago. Now I am back in Israel. Jetlag was crazy, and then I got sick on top of all of it, but I wouldn't have changed any of it. I will just have to plant a tree to offset my currently huge carbon footprint with this study abroad. 

These are the top three things that have happened within the past month. This past month was when school really set in, and we all got into our ruts of schoolwork and everything. My classes are all awesome and my experiences everyday here are all awesome (whether they be great acts of kindness, or great acts of de-humanization), they all leave me speechless most of the time, and fill me with awe that this could happen.

The pace of Hebrew has picked up dramatically. We think that this is because our professors realized we have less than one month left here (only 25 days) and we apparently need to finish our book (or at least get really close to finishing), and we are currently on page 340 of 469. So either this month is going to get crazy, or we are going to be doing the "highlights" of level Aleph. We are JUST starting to learn the past tense in verbs, which is awesome, since that is what I am more familiar with (having studied Biblical Hebrew). 

When It Hits Home

Less than two months!!!! I am not sure how to even handle this. I am excited, terribly sad, and apprehensive all at the same time. I have less than two weeks left in my current semester and now Jerusalem is shockingly evident. I do my Visa process tomorrow and then I have to take care of my loans and all of that good stuff.

One of the things that will be the hardest for me to overcome is missing the "lasts." I am a senior this year, so this means that I will be missing my graduation walk (which in all honesty, isn't really that sad). What I am sad for is this final month of school, because it is essentially my last month with some of the most amazing people I have ever met. And I'm not ready to say goodbye yet. I've vocalized it once before at a meeting, but it really hasn't set in until now. "I come back to no one." When I am done and return home school will have been over for at least a month. My classmates will be seeking jobs and gone, and it really sucks knowing (even though I wish it wasn't true in the slightest) that these next two weeks may be the last time I ever see some of these people ever again in my life. 

My time table is becoming smaller and smaller. There is a world of firsts before me, yet I am finally coming to terms with the lasts that are present around me. 

In my class, "Legacy of Luther," we are discussing Dorothee Soelle and her understanding of mysticism. She identifies three aspects to mysticism. They are: 

1. Be Amazed

2. Let Go

3. Resist/Heal

I finally feel like I am being amazed by my life that will be happening. It is becoming more immanent and more real. I honestly don't want to let go yet, and I think that will be the hardest for me. I won't permanently let go, of course. Simply, the idea that everyone will stay the same. Who knows. Maybe when I come home I will find out I will be in the company of my friends in the future. That would honestly be fantastic, and I can only hope. For now, the emotions are hitting hard.